Motivations
by A Curious Stranger
Summary: A look into the minds of Organization XIII. Why they fight and their thoughts on their existence.


Disclaimer: I don't own Square-Enix, Disney, or DC Comics

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Upon seeing his enemies, the Key of Destiny darts around his enemies with quick feet before cutting them in two and sending scorching light to mop up whatever remains of his adversaries.

Roxas is an enigma to the members of the Organization. The fact that they now have a Keybearer is confusing enough, but the sight of the boy using holy light to obliterate their enemies into nothingness while he cuts bodies and souls with the mightiest weapon in the universe is one of the most perplexing things that they have seen in their long states of nonexistence. And in the quiet halls of the Castle that Never Was, they can't help but wonder why the boy fights for them.

Roxas could care less about his colleagues' opinions (actually he can't). They couldn't possibly understand the rush of … something that he's sure would be emotion. Unlike the rest, his Other still lives and breathes and FEELS. Fittingly, the Key of Destiny is able to take in the echoes of emotions and lock them in his chest.

Sora had always been a curious boy, and though Roxas possesses no memories of his Other, he still retains that curiosity. The urge to see and understand whatever interests him. And those echoes of emotions are very interesting indeed. In order to satisfy that interest, he is ready to smite whatever obstacle he faces and kill untold billions. After all, nobodies don't feel guilt. And if he does get his Other back and manage to feel guilt again … well, he'll cross that bridge when he gets there.

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The Savage Nymph is a creature of beauty and rage. With a seraphic face and an angelic smile, she stabs and cuts and bathes in her enemies' blood.

As a girl who surrounded herself with knives and mindless animals, Larxene managed to take her first life at six by stabbing her neighbor's dog after it's incessant barking had pushed her over the edge. As she grew older and continued killing with glee, feeling Shadows tear her heart out from her body was a fascinating experience. It was only later after she wandered around Traverse Town lost and confused, she began to understand what had happened to her. And after instinctively frying a would-be rapist with a bolt of lighting summoned from the darkness; she understood that she couldn't feel pleasure anymore. It was a sobering experience for her. The idea of being unable to laugh with glee while her opponent bled or feel her heart leap with joy as her kunai sang a melody of pain was unbearable, or it would have been anyway if she could feel.

Like the others of the Organization, Larxene wants her heart back. Immediately after she gets it back she will kill everyone around her. To surround herself with the corpses of people she worked with for so long is such a delicious thought to her that despite her emotionless nature, Larxene can't help but smile.

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As the Graceful Assassin, Marluxia is naught but a wraith to his foes. Gliding from shadow to shadow, the most anyone manages to see is a cold smirk and the flash of an ornate scythe.

He'd been a killer as a Somebody, a true master of the art of death, but his passion had always been gardening. It first started with him buying a tomato plant after a job as a way to relax after a night of death. It soon progressed to buying roses and keeping them in his safe houses until finally, the only thing Marluxia wanted was to have a home with a massive lawn with which he could grow his children. To see his garden flourish brought him more joy than women or food or drugs could have ever brought him. And he can't wait until he gets back his heart because immediately afterwards, he'll finally be able to surround himself with glorious life and pleasure rather than the empty nothingness that is his current existence.

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The Gambler of Fate rarely fights, but when he does he is nothing more than a self-assured grin and the sound of clinking poker chips. Afterwards, his enemies generally find themselves gutted by playing cards or find their bones crushed by a massive dice.

Luxord had been a high-roller and a card shark in his other life. With deft flourishes he dealt his cards and would easily win whatever games he played. Most of the time anyway. When the Heartless came to his world, Luxord had been drunk out of his mind and offered the Shadows and Soldiers a drink and a game. In return, a Soldier had hopped over to him and tore open his chest before taking his heart. He woke up some time later with a killer headache and a deck of cards.

Because he is no longer able to take joy in his craft, Luxord plays along in the game that the universe has set up for him. He has always been a winner and a bit of a cheater. As long as he isn't caught, he is confident that given enough time, he'll be able to win back his heart from the Universe and laugh with true joy. When he is tired of the constant assignments that Xemnas hands out from his ivory throne, he looks out onto the gathering Kingdom Hearts and tries to remember the thrill of victory and the bitterness of defeat. After he gets back his heart Luxord will find the best opponents in the universe and gamble his nights away.

Luxord's mind is full of probabilities and chances. He has lived so far by cheating Lady Luck using nothing more than his probability and time bending skills that the universe has gifted him with after winning his Other. That is why he's sure that if he had a heart, he is sure that he would despise the little Keybearer named Sora. Unlike him who must rig his every action in order to stay in the game that the Universe has readied for him, Sora faces impossible odds with nothing more than a ready grin and ready friends. And somehow, defying all logic, the boy survives because of the love that Fortune holds for him. Love that should by all rights be his.

Luxord is a jealous lover.

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The Melodious Nocturne doesn't like to fight. But if he is pushed enough he becomes a raging typhoon that drowns his enemies in cold, uncaring water while he crushes their bodies with unyielding pressure.

Demyx had been an orphan left to wallow in misery in his seaside city. He learned to swim at age five, picked up his first sitar at age ten, learned how to love a woman at age fourteen, and was taken by the shadows at age twenty two.

Throughout his life he'd been a sailor, a smuggler, a musician, and everything in between. Because he was found by Xigbar while lying unconscious on a beach, he is the only member besides Roxas to have joined with no choice in the matter. After he'd refused to accept his status as a Nobody and his inability to feel emotions, Demyx tried his best to emulate emotions. He'd failed initially until he managed to figure out that questions tended to annoy scientists even if they had near-infinite patience. After being nearly flash-frozen by an irritated Vexen after a truly remarkable quip, Demyx instinctively struck out with a jet of water that had pierced through two walls of the Castle that Never Was and left Vexen with a gaping wound he'd been forced to go to Zexion for. Afterwards, Demyx got his first assignment.

Demyx wants his heart back because he wants to feel his music again. After years of playing calming chords and wrenching songs, the fact that he can no longer feel the music pierce his inner being is like a massive wound. Though he thinks that he's made what could be friends with Axel and by proxy Roxas, he doesn't lie to himself and say that he would stay with them forever and ever after he gets back his heart. He knows that after getting back his emotions he'll strike out on his own to some watery land singing and playing the nights away.

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The Flurry of Dancing Flames loves to fight. After darting forward with his blazing chakrams, he'll burn his enemies as they reel from his sudden charge until they are reduced to ash. And then he'll set the ashes alight again just to be thorough.

He'd been an arsonist in his past life. A cocky teenager who smelled of gasoline, Axel had found joy in setting alight whatever caught his fancy. Whenever he met his friends they would always complain of smelling smoke and ash. After they told him to stop smoking before he would see them, Axel simply grinned before letting the conversation turn to other matters. He was taken into the darkness several years later as he set a warehouse on fire in a desperate attempt to keep the light burning and the Shadows away.

After waking up in the World that Never Was, Axel found out that he could conjure flame without a lighter. And seeing how he was surrounded by so many of the bastards that had robbed him of everything, he immediately set his gifts to good use.

Saix had been the one to find him. After the snobby little turd had insulted him unable to believe that a Nobody could be created from such a shallow soul, Axel managed to slice two deep cuts into the other man's head with his chakrams conjured from flame. One brutal fight and one intervention from the Superior later, Axel joined the Organization. After being informed of his inability to feel, Axel merely shrugged before going to his newly assigned quarters. It was only after he met Roxas that he began to miss his emotions. After all what good was hanging out with a unique person like a Keybearer if he couldn't enjoy it? After the realization, Axel kept himself cooped up in his quarters as his long gone and ignored emotions seemed to crawl to his side before tantalizingly sliding away.

Now Axel fights to get back his heart. He fights and kills so that he can finally just go outside with his best friend and actually have fun. He fights so that he can ogle at women with genuine interest while Roxas berates him. As corny as it may sound to him, Axel fights for friendship.

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When the Luna Diviner does battle, he becomes a juggernaut. Armor, muscle, bones, swords, spears, shields, and magic do not matter to him. If he finds an enemy with an impenetrable defense, he just gets stronger and turns that enemy with the impenetrable defense into a lump of tender meat.

Saix does not remember his life as a Someone. The only things he that he can get more than a glimpse of are the color red, an endless scream, and the shining moon.

After he joined the Organization and learned of his condition, a sense of wrongness filled him and has not left. No matter what he does to rid himself of that condition, it does not leave.

When he enters battle at the behest of the Superior and lashes out at his foes with his massive claymore, the sense of wrongness quadruples itself. While he seemingly claws and rends at random, Saix is perfectly aware of his actions. Every move and every attack is smoothly calculated and choreographed. Saix can't help but to hate, no, he Loathe his rationality. Although he can't remember his other life, he feels as though thoughts should have no place in battle. The only thing that should exist is him and his enemy. Nothing else. Things like allies should not exist in his berserk fury, and yet he finds himself avoiding his comrades in the middle of heavy combat.

Saix despises his thoughts. And so he works with Xemnas to get back his heart and stop thinking. As soon as his heart returns to him, he will let go of logic. Saix is a beast, a berserker. And such creatures have no need of higher thought.

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The Cloaked Schemer does not fight in the sense that he punches or kicks his enemies. Instead he approaches whoever his target may be and traps them in a world of nightmares. By the time he leaves, his target is left but a shivering wreck. No matter how powerful or weak the foe, in the end they are all turned into mere shells of their former selves.

He had once been Ienzo, an apprentice of Ansem the Wise. As one of six apprentices chosen by him, his life had consisted of constant lessons and experiments. But unlike his friends, Ienzo never managed to find what he could specialize in until he saw Xehanort accept the Darkness and turn the beautiful Garden into a wasteland.

After he awakes and begins to call himself Zexion is he able to begin studying his chosen craft of psychology. Most interesting to him is the emotion called fear. If he thinks hard enough, Zexion manages to get a flash of what had probably been that emotion when he manages to remember seeing the Darkness consume his friends. But again, Zexion is alone amongst his fellow scientists in that he has no idea how to begin his studies. But one day, a Dusk brought him a journal from a dead world that had jumpstarted his research. Titled "A Study of Fear" by Doctor J. Crane, Zexion devoured the journal and stared at the words as though they held the meaning of existence itself. Now he is a master of his craft and is never without specimens with which to experiment.

The only thing left now is to get back his heart. Once he has that, Zexion can start to test himself. All of those descriptions of fear by Doctor Crane has managed to make Zexion interested in just what he fears himself. If he dies from the fear he causes himself, at least he'd have died with understanding. In the name of science and progress, Zexi- Ienzo is ready to risk his life and sanity.

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When the Silent Hero walks, the Earth listens and devours his enemies. After gobbling up his foes and spitting them back out as corpses, the Earth waits for Lexaeus' empty praise before settling down.

Elaeus had studied geology as a scientist. A dedicated man, Elaeus always made sure to clean up after himself in the labs and keep his lab coats neat and starched. Afterwards, he would go out and collect soil samples while chaperoning some children who wanted to play with Unca' Laeus. Despite his taciturn demeanor, something about him had always attracted children to him like a moth to a flame. Right before the shadows consumed him later on in his lefe, Elaeus shed his first tear for the children he would never get to see grow.

When he became Lexaeus, the Organization's number five, he remained steady in a group that threatened to collapse in on itself. Through his rock steady attitude, the Organization had managed to stay together after the members took note of Lexaeus' unwavering loyalty to his friends.

Lexaeus knows that he is a monster. A being that should not exist. But because his friends still cling to their lives, Lexaeus needs to be there in order to keep their faith up. Despite his efforts, the Organization is still a fragile thing, but if it has lasted this long, who's to say that it won't last long enough to accomplish their goals?

Lexaeus is the only true optimist in the group. He has faith in Xemnas' grand plan and truly believes that once he gets back his heart, life will go back to the way it was before the discovery of the Heartless. Lexaeus is naïve, but that does not matter to anyone in the Organization. Because as long as he keeps his faith, the others will keep their faith too.

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Because the Chilly Academic rarely sees combat, he has specialized in defense so much that only Lexaeus is able to pierce his shield. But in those rare instances Vexen must rid himself of nuisances; merciless ice crushes and freezes his foes so that he may work in piece.

Before coming to the Garden, Even had lived in the mountaintops full of ice and snow. As one of Ansem the Wise's apprentices, he had studied magic and thermodynamics. Even with the discovery of the Heartless, Even still continued to study his craft with dedication. After Braig had dragged him down to the final experiment, all of his thoughts had still been on the cold that consumed his life. As it turned out, Darkness did a better job of that.

Out of all of the members of the Organization, Vexen is the only one who isn't sure of whether he wants his heart back or not. As a dedicated scientist, Vexen does not care whether he can feel emotions or not. As long as he can contribute to science, Vexen is fine with his nearly nonexistent state. It is only because Xemnas had opened Vexen's mind to such new and fascinating topics that he helps his former friends. But when he is alone, Vexen admits to himself that feeling pride at his discoveries would be very acceptable and to see the dumbfounded expression of Xigbar and Lexaeus' tacit demeanor as he gleefully shows off a successful experiment would be very nice indeed.

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When the Whirlwind Lancer leaps into action, the only thing his enemies see is a shadow growing ever so bigger and bigger before they are skewered by lances and their allies are blown away by gale force winds.

Of all of the apprentices, Dilan was the only one to learn the art of the soldier. As one of Ansem the Wise's apprentices and a possible heir to the throne, he was taught by the greatest warriors the Garden had ever produced. SOLDIERs had taught him how to use all of his senses to boost his combat capabilities while SeeDs taught him how to channel magic and properly thrust his lance. After returning to the Garden to continue his work as a scientist, he was devoured by the Heartless before he could even call up a simple Aero spell.

As a proper soldier, Xaldin follows Xemnas' orders to the letter. He does not complain like Demyx or grumble like Vexen. He goes out, does his job, and comes back for the next mission. Xaldin is empty, even for a Nobody. He has no ambitions or dreams. All that is waiting for him is the Superior and his plan. Even if does get back his heart from the Darkness, Xaldin doesn't know what he'll do with the emotions. But as long as he has orders, Xaldin will not be lost.

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With a few pounds of pressure, the Freeshooter kills an Emperor from a room miles outside of the man's domain. Without even seeing his enemies, the Freeshooter wipes out an entire army from a gummy ship high above his targets' planet.

Braig had been a physicist as one of Ansem's apprentices. By the time he was twelve, he was doing calculus and quantum physics in a dusty old classroom when he wasn't outside flying kites or running in the gardens with the servants. As he grew older, the discovery of the Heartless hadn't fazed him much, but seeing the creatures scale walls and melt into the ground had piqued his interest. After all, creatures that could defy the laws he had set so much by must be interesting. When Xehanort had announced a final experiment, he'd all but dragged Even to see the show. It was a shame that the Heartless managed to kill Braig. Braig's emotions had always been one his most distinctive features.

When Xigbar began to work for Xemnas, he discovered that the Darkness had given him the power to bend space. The scientist in him would have danced in joy if it weren't for the fact that he couldn't feel emotions anymore. After designing his weapons (he still wasn't sure what to call them) Xigbar had promptly began to test his limits by sniping at the Shadows and Neoshadows that wandered The World that Never Was. Unfortunately for him, he had miscalculated one of his warps and managed to send a gun arrow into his right eye. Afterwards, Xigbar took his powers more seriously and began to work at designing new theorems and equations to determine exactly where his portals would appear.

When he is off opening planets to darkness or looking for new members, Xigbar can't help but to long for the old days when all he had to worry about was angering the King or making a fool out of himself during royal functions. After he finishes reminiscing, Xigbar promises himself that when he gets his heart back, the first thing he'll do is run around some grassy plain while flying a kite while he enjoys the wind at his back. Because even after all of his experiences, in some ways, Xigbar is still the child who longed to move with no restrictions.

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No one has seen the Superior fight, but every member of the Organization is sure that if he should ever decide to wage war against his enemies, even the fearsome Chernabog would kneel before their leader.

Xehanort never knew who he was. All that he knew were scattered memories of a shining key. After Ansem the Wise found him, that key had always stayed in his mind. When he discovered the Heartless, the image of the key shone out even more. Right before the Darkness overtook him and his heartless left him, Xehanort was sure that he was on the brink of getting back his memories.

As Xemnas he stays on his marble throne giving orders, all he can do is reflect and think. His mind wanders from his plan to create Kingdom Hearts to what worlds are ready to be opened to the depths of Darkness. But as always, that damnable key comes back to his mind.

Xemnas is an intimidating figure. High in his throne he plots and schemes. And the first time a new member joins them, he or she can't help but to think of a regal king looking down on his subjects. Luxord had even made a joke of it once by calling one of his missions his duty for "King and Country." In response, Xemnas simply stared at the man trying to decide whether he should obliterate the fool or not. Memories of his time as a false Ansem still haunted him after all. Wisely, Luxord hastily left his presence after picking up on the hostility radiating towards him.

Xemna's control of Nothingness makes him think. After the Darkness stole everything he had, seeing ivory thorns consume his enemies made him wonder. As a leader of Nothings, is he the closest one to a Something? Or rather, is he simply the most pathetic Nothing of all? Philosophy had always interested him, and the paradoxes and quandaries offered to him give Xemnas a great distraction from his duties. He does not think of wasting time because as eternal beings, Nobodies have all the time in the world.

Sometimes Xemnas thinks of reintegrating his heart. He knows exactly why every one of his subordinates wants their hearts, but thinking of his own reason makes him realize just how pathetic he is. He wants his heart so that when he finally gets back his memories, he'll be able to appreciate them so much more than he could as a Nobody. With the exception of Xaldin, Xemnas is the most pathetic member of Organization XIII.


End file.
